Awakened by a *Thump*

So, the dream world has gotten the better of me once again.  I woke up mid-fall as I was running away.  My foot slipped out from under me, and I fell hard on the floor.  It felt like I had burnt off the entire surface of my knee with the ensuing carpet burn.  All because of a stupid dream.  I woke Amanda up, and made her pretty annoyed with me, all because of a stupid dream.

I know Amanda feels bad for me when I have a dream that scares or startles me that much.  But I can also hear the tone of her voice when she asks me what happened.  To be fair, she was startled out of a sound sleep once again to hear me sleepwalking and reacting to a dream.  I probably yelled, and definitely made a loud thump when I hit the floor.

Anyway, I'm going to stay awake for a while and let her get back to sleep.  Hopefully in an hour or so, I'll be able to as well...

Nostalgia

Amanda and I just spent the last two and a half hours talking.  Most of it was spent talking about the not-so-fun points earlier in our lives -- about bad jobs, bad apartments, and times we weren't doing so great financially.  Each of us have had some times that felt pretty miserable, but it was sort of fun to reminisce about them together.  We told stories about old roommates and incidents between us and them, and remembered our first apartments and all of their shortcomings.

When we decided it was probably bedtime, I fired up my iMac to see if I had photos on there from my first apartment.  I did, but I also had something better:  a video I had taken.  I took the video to send it to my brother, and it was a walk through of the apartment along with my commentary.  It was great.  Amanda and I both laughed about the dorky way I acted in the video, and commented about how badly stuff was arranged in the apartment, and had a great time doing it.

At the time I lived there though, I knew the apartment was a temporary stop.  I never fully unpacked, and spent a fair amount of time worrying about money because the rent was high and my landlord's claim that the smaller, cheaper apartment he rented out would become available soon was not panning out.  I was in a new job, where I felt like I wasn't contributing much and couldn't find things to keep busy with.  In short, in many ways I wasn't very happy there.  But it sure put a smile on my face to look back on it and see how far I've come in five years.

Maybe tomorrow after I'm done at the Library, Amanda and I will make a similar video of our current apartment.  Maybe in five years we'll sit together at my computer, watch it, and smile about how young we were, how little we knew, and how much things have changed.

Election Issues

Next Monday is our local Election Day, and as of yet, I know next to nothing about most of the candidates.  I'm hoping to have some time this weekend (maybe between going into the library for a program on Saturday and then again on Sunday) to read up on what each of them are promising.

But then again, it might be simpler not to.  I already know of two people I plan to vote for because I've seen proof that they are pro-library.  It's a limited amount of data to know about a person, I admit, but as a practical matter, knowing someone is in favour of the organization that pays my salary is more useful to me than any number of promises about fixing potholes or lowering taxes.  (Please note that I picked those two topics of discussion out of thin air -- I'm not using them to single out any of the candidates).

Similarly, I know one or two people I really don't want to vote for.  Again, it's based on a very limited thing -- their campaign signs.  As a library technician, I know the dangers of judging a book by its cover.  However, I've also come to a point in my life where a lousy cover makes me wonder where else the publisher and/or author cut corners in the book.  Was it edited poorly?  Is the author coasting on past successes?  If a candidate makes a sign that makes me shake my head and wonder what they were thinking, I start to question that candidate's judgement a little.  They've already failed in their first test, and they haven't been elected yet.

So we'll see what happens.  I plan to do my duty and vote.  I just don't know how much more informed my vote will be than it currently is...

Oldies Movie Night

I've been sick all week, so when Amanda proposed that we take it easy tonight, order pizza, and watch a John Hughes movie from the '80s, I agreed.  I had never seen any of the movies she suggested, and after we searched to see what Netflix had, we decided on Ferris Bueller's Day Off.

...it was pretty good!  I don't know that it quite lived up to everything I had heard about the movie, but it was good.

When we finished that, Amanda commandeered Netflix and loaded up How to Marry a Millionaire, and it just finished.  I think tonight was just what I needed after a solid week of being sick:  an evening on the couch with my favourite person.

High Hopes Dashed

Amanda's favourite house is only a few blocks away from where we live. When we go for a walk together, we often head down that particular street and stop to admire the house. She's told me more than once that if it ever is for sale, we'll take a look at it regardless of whether the price is in our range or not.

When we were driving to her parents' house for supper tonight, Amanda pointed and said "My favourite house is for sale!" We quickly agreed to drive by on the way home to confirm her sighting. So a few minutes ago, we were driving home and Amanda reminded me. So we turned off and looped back around. We could see the house up ahead, and as we drove closer, saw the sign...

...a sign that said "Elect Blah for council". >:-(

My Niece

I don't know if I've mentioned her without it being in passing, but my newly-acquired niece is pretty awesome. She's cheerful, smart, and the fact that she likes Hello Kitty *and* Ninja Turtles is incredibly cool. The middle statement really hit home today, as I found myself in a position of talking with an eight year old. I think he was trying to impress me, but the conversation ended up feeling like a month's worth of late-1980s gossip about video games. He had all sorts of theories that were sort of the equivalent of "If you beat Mario 37 times, he gets a gun". After less than five minutes, I was thinking that my niece (only five years old) was a better conversationalist than that boy.  So, she's pretty cool, and when she, her mom, and her brother come to the library, she hops right into the chair next to me to ask me to search for books for her.

This all makes what happened on Saturday night even funnier. Amanda was reading our niece a bedtime story that involved various Marvel superheroes and villains. One page showed the Blob, a nemesis of the X-Men. Our niece asked about him, and I explained that he's really fat and can't be hurt. After a bit of talking, she pointed at my stomach and said "Like that one?" I said yes, and she said "It's soo big!" (In reference to my stomach)

I thought it was hilarious, Amanda (while grinning) told her that it wasn't a very nice thing to say. Anyway, when the time came for us to leave, I said goodbye and scooted up the stairs. Amanda was a little bit behind me. But I clearly heard our niece say "Auntie Amanda, you forgot to close the door!" So Amanda walked back down the stairs, and I heard the bedroom door shut. Then after a second, I heard her yell "AUNTIE AMANDA, you forgot to say goodbye!"

Her parents, Amanda, and I all started cracking up.

The Blame Game

As a culture, we like the play the "What-if" game. What if a different actor had been in the movie? What if I hadn't gone to Japan? What if I hadn't met Amanda? (The last one is a particularly horrible thought!)

In fact, we're encouraged to think this way -- to look back at the decisions we've made and how they contributed to our current situation. For instance, when I worked at a mill a few years ago, I was hit by a tier of lumber at the stacker. The operator hadn't been paying attention, and forwarded the next tier before I finished pulling the poorly-graded boards away from the previous one. It's pretty clear that the stacker operator was at fault, but when we did an accident investigation, we had to look at the root cause. I was on the wrong side of the boards.

I didn't cause the accident, and the other person involved was certainly to blame. But I had made what I'd normally call a low-percentage move -- something that may work, but has a low percentage of happening without other consequences (see balancing a milk jug on a cereal box).

Traffic accident investigations and post-action reports work the same way too. They focus on finding all things that may have led to the final result. Were you past the stop line? You may have contributed. Were you texting with your cell phone? Your distraction may have helped cause the accident. I realize these examples are concrete evidence rather than matters of opinion, but they help show that as a society, we're obsessed with looking for anything that might have helped to cause an event.

We need to get away from victim blaming. This is true. But at the same time, I think that people need to realize that our culture surrounds us with these few questions: "What if?" and "How could it have been avoided?" So if we screw up and ask these questions at precisely the wrong time, please cut us a little slack before denouncing us as horrible people, okay? Believe it or not, most of us are actively trying *not* to be.

The Wheels that Drive our Lives

Since January, we've been keeping our eyes open for a newer car for Amanda. Her faithful Ford Taurus  that has served her well for many years is now on its last legs. Her family is definitely a Ford family. Her dad owns a Ford truck and a Mercury, and her mom drives a ford as well. Her sister and sister-in-law? Also Fords.

As for me, my family has a bigger mixture. Dad: Ford, Mom: Toyota for life, Tyler: Dodge now, but who knows later? I've ended up taking after my mom -- I drive a Toyota Yaris, and if I were to win the lottery, would happily stay in the Toyota family.

So what has it been like looking at vehicles with Amanda? Well, it mostly involves checking out used Fords while I excitedly point out any Toyota on the lot. I constantly joke that Amanda should get a newer version of my car so she can be cool like me. But she's a Ford fan.

So it looks like this Fehr household will have a multiple automotive personality disorder: Fords for the hydraulic shop and Toyotas for the library.

Words that *Should* Exist

I remember doing some writing when I was a child. I wrote about a man, or robot, or something that was in trouble. At the most exciting part (in my pre-ten-year-old's opinion), I wrote that the character "jamp" out of the way. I remember showing it to my parents and having a lengthy "discussion" (they discussed, I argued), I finally gave in and changed it to "jumped."

I think I associated the verb jump along with other action words. After all, my character hadn't "runned" or "standed." Why in the world would my character have jumped? This is why English, for all its versatility, is a screwy language. Japanese is way, way, way better. :-)

Staff Parties

The Library's staff barbecue was tonight, and Amanda and I were there. It was a lot of fun, as we had a handful of people who all wandered over to see the bling on our hands from getting married. Most of them agreed that my ring is nice (I prefer the word "spiffy"), and that Amanda's ring is beautiful.

It's always kind of weird getting together with one of our groups of co-workers like that. One of us is really familiar and at-ease with the group, while the other is a little more on the outside of things. Next week, we'll be changing roles when we attend the staff golfing day for Amanda's shop. Luckily, I know at least two of her co-workers reasonably well (her dad and brother), so as long as I'm grouped up with Amanda, her dad, or her brother, I'll have someone to visit with throughout the day. ...That said, Amanda and I may have to cheat so that we're in the same grouping. I've never gone golfing with her before, and I'd really like to!